Unfortunately, I cant. (I am sheltered at home.) For a long time, I believed my tech career was the cornerstone, the compass of my accomplishments, but it isn’t. It is only a path; one of multiple paths that could lead me toward a successful self-realization. I remember saying in job interviews, ‘I love to challenge and evolve the way people interact through technology.’ At this point (if you have already read my first blog post, ‘Hello World’), that is difficult to find true. It isn’t evolving; it is mutating in the most horrible ways, like a radioactive zombie feeding on empty and shallow values and ideas.

But enough criticizing tech and web content; there will be plenty of time for that (I would much rather propose small drops of refreshing content instead). This article stems from a retrospection of what I am doing, or perhaps, what I truly want to do. As I always say, I have bills to pay (commitments I accepted to earn the things I want), and that is why I must continue to give my best at my job. It is a role that is no longer exciting, but it is something I am good at.

Fig 04. A peaceful view from my desk that keeps everything in perspective.

What truly worth

Still, I would love to go rogue with my plans. Indeed, this photography project is only a sample of the things I’ve realized are truly worth doing to improve our collective experience and the maturity of society. I am not a professional photographer; I am just an enthusiastic, nerdy guy who found joy in analog pictures, a relief that heals (and not only) more than just the disappointments I’ve previously mentioned.

The struggle

I said “not only” because there is more weighing on my mind. I am also facing the sheer boredom of my current project and the nagging feeling of underutilized potential. I remember projects where I was truly challenged and able to use my skills to their fullest—this is the opposite.

Then there is the relentless “organizational posturing” of the modern workplace. Sure, I have the work-from-home benefit, a health plan, and those small perks if I go to the office (no, thank you). But the routine is always the same: requirements meetings, performance evaluations, and now, for the first time, someone told me: “You’re not creative”. Spare me the nonsense! I have proposed improvements and changes more than once, only to be told, “There is already a definition for that”, or “We can’t do that right now”. This is banking software! One cannot be creative here; it is a relentless, dull, and tedious business. It doesn’t matter if it’s a mobile app—it is still banking!

A liberating thought

A few years ago, I would have been absolutely crushed by that poor and square “evaluation”. Now, I realize that while they pay the salary I use to buy my food, my film rolls, and my beers (and cover the mortgage and other boring necessities) they do not even know my true potential. They haven’t seen the “right stuff” I have demonstrated many times before.

I simply do not care what they think anymore. I am over that corporate ladder; indeed, I have stepped aside. That isn’t what success looks like. Keep your indicators, your ‘organizational culture’, and your dull conclusions. I am still working on their project (it isn’t even theirs; it is a client project), and I will do what is asked of me—no more, no less. I will keep the monthly salary, and I will keep pushing my creativity in the places that truly deserve it.